In Islam, the rights of parents hold a paramount position, second only to the worship of Allah. The Quran and the teachings of Prophet Muhammad ﷺ repeatedly emphasize kindness, respect, and dutifulness towards parents. This article explores the Islamic perspective on parental rights and provides practical guidance on how to honor them in everyday life.
The Command to Be Kind to Parents in the Quran
The Quran explicitly commands believers to treat their parents with utmost kindness and respect. In Surah Al-Israa, Allah says: « Thy Lord hath decreed that ye worship none but Him, and that ye be kind to parents. Whether one or both of them attain old age in thy life, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them, but address them in terms of honour. » (Surah Al-Israa, verse 23) This verse places the duty of kindness to parents immediately after the command to worship Allah alone, highlighting its significance.
Similarly, in Surah Luqman, Allah reminds us of the immense effort mothers put into raising their children: « And We have enjoined on man (to be good) to his parents: in travail upon travail did his mother bear him, and in years twain was his weaning: (hear the command), ‘Show gratitude to Me and to thy parents: to Me is (thy final) Goal.’ » (Surah Luqman, verse 14) Gratitude to parents is linked directly to gratitude to Allah, underscoring its spiritual weight.
Furthermore, Allah commands general goodness to parents in multiple verses. In Surah An-Nisaa, He instructs: « Serve Allah, and join not any partners with Him; and do good- to parents, kinsfolk, orphans, those in need… » (Surah An-Nisaa, verse 36) This comprehensive command places parents at the top of the list of those deserving our good treatment.
The Exception: When Parents Disbelieve
Islam commands kindness to parents even if they are non-Muslims, as long as they do not force one to abandon faith. Allah says in Surah Al-Ankaboot: « We have enjoined on man kindness to parents: but if they (either of them) strive (to force) thee to join with Me (in worship) anything of which thou hast no knowledge, obey them not. Ye have (all) to return to me, and I will tell you (the truth) of all that ye did. » (Surah Al-Ankaboot, verse 8) Thus, while obedience in matters of faith is not required, kindness and respect remain obligatory.
The Priority of the Mother in Islam
The Prophet ﷺ repeatedly emphasized the special status of the mother. In a famous hadith, Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) reported that a man asked the Messenger of Allah ﷺ: « O Messenger of Allah, who is the most entitled among people to my good companionship? » He said: « Your mother. » The man said: « Who next? » He said: « Your mother. » The man asked again: « Who next? » He replied: « Your mother. » The man further said: « Who next? » He said: « Your father. » (Narrated by Muslim) This hadith shows that the mother has three times the right of the father to good treatment.
Another narration from Bahz ibn Hakīm reports that the Prophet ﷺ said: « Your mother, then your mother, then your mother, then your father, then the next in nearness and so on. » (Narrated by Abu Dawood) The repetition emphasizes the mother’s unparalleled position, due to the hardships of pregnancy, childbirth, and nursing.
Honoring the mother includes speaking gently, serving her, and being patient with her, especially in old age. The Quran itself acknowledges the mother’s sacrifice: « In pain did his mother bear him, and in pain did she give him birth. » (Surah Al-Ahqaf, verse 15)
Practical Ways to Honor Parents Daily
Honoring parents (birr al-walidayn) is not limited to grand gestures; it is built on daily acts of kindness and respect. Here are some practical ways:
1. **Speak respectfully**: Avoid any word of contempt or harshness. The Quran says: « say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them, but address them in terms of honour. » (Surah Al-Israa, verse 23) Use gentle words, even when disagreeing.
2. **Serve them willingly**: The Prophet ﷺ told a man who wanted to join jihad: « Then strive in serving them. » (Narrated by Bukhari and Muslim) Serving parents is a form of worship.
3. **Be humble**: « And, out of kindness, lower to them the wing of humility, and say: ‘My Lord! bestow on them thy Mercy even as they cherished me in childhood.’ » (Surah Al-Israa, verse 24) Humility before parents is a sign of true faith.
4. **Make dua for them**: Pray for their well-being and forgiveness, as taught in the Quran.
5. **Avoid causing them anger**: The Prophet ﷺ said: « The pleasure of Allah is in the pleasure of the parents, and the displeasure of Allah is in the displeasure of the parents. » (Narrated by At-Tirmidhi) Displeasing parents brings Allah’s displeasure.
6. **Maintain ties even after their death**: Continue to pray for them, give charity on their behalf, and honor their friends and relatives.
To help you remember duas for parents, you can use the supplications (duas) collection on Al Muslim Plus, which includes specific prayers for parents.
Avoiding the Major Sin of Disobedience
Disobeying parents is a major sin. The Prophet ﷺ warned: « It is one of the major sins when a man abuses his parents. » (Narrated by Bukhari and Muslim) Even indirect abuse, such as causing others to curse one’s parents, is forbidden. Moreover, failing to care for elderly parents is a cause for loss: « May his nose be rubbed in dust… the one whose parents, one of them or both, reach old age in his life yet he does not enter Paradise. » (Narrated by Muslim) This hadith strongly urges us to seize the opportunity to serve parents before it is too late.
Balancing Jihad and Parental Rights
The Prophet ﷺ prioritized parental rights even over acts of worship like jihad. In a hadith, a man came to the Prophet ﷺ seeking permission to fight in Allah’s cause. The Prophet asked: « Are your parents alive? » He said: « Yes. » The Prophet ﷺ said: « Then strive in serving them. » (Narrated by Bukhari and Muslim) Similarly, a man emigrated from Yemen without his parents’ permission, and the Prophet ﷺ told him: « Go back to them and seek their permission. If they give you permission, you can engage in Jihad, otherwise, be dutiful to them. » (Narrated by Abu Dawood) This shows that serving parents takes precedence over voluntary acts of worship.
This principle extends to other good deeds: if parents need care, it becomes an obligation to prioritize them. However, in cases where parents demand something sinful, obedience is not required, but kindness must still be maintained.
The Reward of Dutifulness and the Consequences of Disobedience
Dutifulness to parents is a means of entering Paradise. The Prophet ﷺ said: « The one whose parents, one of them or both, reach old age in his life yet he does not enter Paradise » — meaning he failed to earn Paradise through serving them. (Narrated by Muslim) Conversely, pleasing parents brings Allah’s pleasure, as stated in.
Inheritance rights also reflect the importance of parents. Allah has prescribed fixed shares for parents in the inheritance of their children: « For parents, a sixth share of the inheritance to each, if the deceased left children; if no children, and the parents are the (only) heirs, the mother has a third… » (Surah An-Nisaa, verse 11) This ensures parents are cared for even after a child’s death.
To understand how Islamic inheritance applies to your situation, you can use the Islamic inheritance calculator on Al Muslim Plus, which distributes shares according to Faraid rules.
Frequently Asked Questions
What are the rights of parents in Islam?
Parents have the right to be treated with kindness, respect, and obedience in lawful matters. They deserve financial support if needed, and children must avoid any form of disrespect, even a word of contempt. The Quran commands believers to be grateful to parents and to care for them, especially in old age.
Who has more rights in Islam, mother or father?
The mother has a greater right to good treatment and companionship. The Prophet ﷺ said that the mother is entitled to three times the good companionship compared to the father. However, both parents must be honored and respected.
Can I disobey my parents if they ask me to do something haram?
No obedience is to be given to a creature if it involves disobedience to the Creator. If parents ask you to do something sinful, you should not obey them, but you must still treat them kindly and respectfully.
How can I honor my parents after their death?
You can honor them by making dua for their forgiveness, giving charity on their behalf, performing Hajj or Umrah for them, maintaining ties with their relatives and friends, and continuing any good deeds they used to do.
Is it a sin to argue with parents?
Arguing in a disrespectful manner is sinful. The Quran prohibits even saying « uff » (a word of contempt) to parents. Disagreements should be handled with gentleness and respect.
What if my parents are non-Muslim?
You must still be kind and dutiful to them. The Quran commands kindness to parents even if they are non-Muslims, as long as they do not force you to abandon your faith. You should treat them well and pray for their guidance.
What are the major sins related to parents?
Disobedience, disrespect, verbal abuse, and causing them grief are major sins. The Prophet ﷺ included abusing parents among the major sins, even if done indirectly by abusing someone else’s parents.
Does serving parents count as jihad?
Yes, serving parents is considered a form of jihad. The Prophet ﷺ told a man who wanted to fight in Allah’s cause to instead strive in serving his parents, indicating that it is equally rewarding.
Honoring parents is a fundamental duty in Islam that brings immense blessings in this life and the Hereafter. By following the Quranic commands and prophetic teachings, we can fulfill this obligation and earn Allah’s pleasure. May Allah help us be dutiful to our parents and grant them mercy. For more duas and Islamic resources, explore the Al Muslim Plus app, which includes a comprehensive collection of supplications and tools to support your spiritual journey. Download the app today and start your journey of faith.
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Sources vérifiées
Citations recoupées mot pour mot avec le corpus canonique (Coran / hadiths).
- Sourate Al-Israa, verset 23
- Sourate Al-Ankaboot, verset 8
- Sourate Al-Ahqaf, verset 15
- Sourate Luqman, verset 14
- Sourate An-Nisaa, verset 36
- Sourate An-Nisaa, verset 11
- Sourate Al-Israa, verset 24
- Hadith n°3260 (Narrated by Bukhari & Muslim) — grade : Authentic hadith
- Hadith n°5361 (Narrated by At-Termedhy) — grade : Hasan/Sound by virtue of corroborating evidence
- Hadith n°3718 (Narrated by Muslim) — grade : Authentic hadith
- Hadith n°5373 (Narrated by Bukhari & Muslim) — grade : Authentic hadith
- Hadith n°58188 (Narrated by Abu Daoud & At-Termedhy & Ahmad) — grade : Good hadith
- Hadith n°4182 (Narrated by Muslim – Narrated by Bukhari & Muslim) — grade : Authentic hadith
- Hadith n°64599 (Narrated by Abu Daoud) — grade : Authentic for being narrated by another companion